What’s Holding You Back From Dreaming Big?

November 27, 2015
Dream Big

A couple of weeks ago I attended a Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) Practitioner Course, of which I spent every day being absolutely in awe and learning so much! (More about that soon!)

Over the course, we talked a lot about creating metaphors for life – ones that empower and inspire us. And this week I got to thinking about a fabulously empowering metaphor that encapsulates this incredible course for me and has essentially fuelled me to ‘up my game’.

You see, I started the week with an exercise where we were to imagine going into a travel agents and booking a holiday…

Want to know where my IMAGINARY holiday was?

A 3* all-inclusive resort in Turkey for £500.

Yep, it was my IMAGINATION, and I didn’t even think big about it, I didn’t ‘make up’ a dream destination, didn’t run wild with my vision or fantasise about an exotic paradise. And that’s something that really struck a chord with me, because whilst others were pretend booking their 5 star months in the Caribbean, I was literally dreaming up ‘standard’.

And really, if I couldn’t even IMAGINE booking more than a 3* holiday, how could I possibly expect to strive for any more than that in my reality?

It became greatly apparent that my ‘dreaming big’ mindset needed some work.

Here’s the thing…

I discovered that we learn a lot of our ‘truths’ (beliefs we think to be true) during childhood. In fact, between 0-7 years old, we literally model everything going on around us. And whilst we eventually start incorporating more of our own views of the world into our belief system as we grow older, naturally the core beliefs and values we modelled for our first 7 years on the planet are going to be pretty embedded within us.

[It’s not until we actually recognise some of those things in our behaviours as adults, that we can start to let go of them and not have them affect us anymore.]

In fact, it’s actually really bloody amazing how much excess child-like ‘thought weight’ we might have been carrying around with us for so long when we start to think about it.

You see, with that in mind, I traced back to one of my major learnings for my first 7 years and plenty more after that, which was that holidays only come around once a year and are set to a certain budget. I also remember that working and earning money in order to pay for a holiday seemed really tiring and stressful (as I’m sure lots of us do). 

So, by natural process, I directly associated money and work and holidays with being tired and stressed out.

Which may just explain why as I’ve been enjoying my work over the past few years, and starting to earn money quite ‘freely’, and of course having had the luxury to travel too, I’ve never been able to shake this horrible sensation that I can’t have been working hard enough. A mindset that has been keeping me small and making work feel hard, so that I could allow myself to ‘deserve’ a break!

So you can imagine the release I felt after soaking up an abundance of NLP tools and techniques that have helped me remove those limiting beliefs about money and holidays and the concept of ‘deserving’. I’m amazed that instead I feel open to plentifulness that can totally feel easy if I let it.

Whilst I’ve still got some work to do, it feels less like a strain to earn money and to spend it on enjoying myself,  and instead it’s starting to feel more like an exciting adventure to be open to what’s next, to come up with creative ideas to earn a living from doing what I love and what I’m great at and working the way that works for me. To dream big about what I want and then remove whatever it is in my own mind that’s standing in my way.

Quite the empowering revelation.

So now, just a couple of weeks later, my bigger and brighter dream holiday destination in a 5 star resort in the Maldives, or Hawaii, or Mexico, or Bali, or wherever I happen to fancy, doesn’t seem so big at all. It feels like its simply waiting for me. It feels like its already mine.

Same way many of my visions do now, actually.

And so that’s my metaphor for my week on the NLP Practitioner Course: a total mindset shift from dreaming small and standard to instead dreaming big, bold and awesome. Not simply about money and holidays and achievements, but even more so about welcoming all that life has to offer, by deleting the disempowering beliefs and decisions that are standing in my way, one by one by one.

Plus, an even more beautiful metaphor for this transition happened on the final night of the course, when I literally SMASHED THROUGH my limiting beliefs…

I wrote them down on a thick chunk of wood, and with the support of some major pep up from an incredible group of new friends, the power of my own strength of mind, and my game face (naturally), I chopped through it with my bare hand!!

And as soon as I’d done it, I burst into tears! Because I’d won against that internal negative talk that was telling me ‘nope, this is going to be so embarrassing, you’re going to be the only one who can’t do it.’

Cos’ instead, I simply flexed my ‘f*ck it muscle’ and smashed right through.

So, some questions for you:

What’s holding you back from dreaming big?

How far do you allow your imagination to go?

Where’s your imagination’s ‘limit’, and what might be standing in your way of exceeding it?

What patterns from your childhood might be limiting what you believe is possible for you?

Because once you begin to uncover these answers, you’ll recognise what limiting beliefs you need to get rid of, in order to be, do and have all the things you really want. And I can totally help you with that, through my 1:1 coaching sessions –>

P.S. Get clear about what you want, get unstuck as to why you don’t have it already, and bust through those pesky limiting beliefs that are standing in your way, with a FREE clarity coaching call with me. Email me here to book your slot –>

P.P.S. Want in on more game changing conversations about living a life that lights you up? Get my monthly love letters direct to your inbox! —>


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